How Gambit Got His Groove Back
by Queen Kaylene
Summary: It’s time to bring in… the Rabid Fangirls.


Title: How Gambit Got His Groove Back

Author: Kay

Disclaimer: Pfffft

Summary: It's time to bring in… the Rabid Fangirls.

Rating: PG-13, for swearing

Spoilers: "Day of Reckoning"

Feedback: Well, if you WANT to…

Comments: I'm an angst queen. Writing a sillyfic. *shakes head* Also, keep in mind I haven't written a fic in over a year. Don't kill me, 'k?

Dedication: To Lilith, as always. And Sovrin. This is not as good as Bad Hair Brad, but…

~*~*~*~

Rogue came to her senses and threw the card away from her, wincing at the force of the explosion. "Bastard," she muttered, growling. She had actually thought he was cute. If you discounted the hair.

And that… thing… on his face.

And of course, the fact that he had just tried to kill her.

Rogue turned the corner to go back, and nearly collided with a pink-haired teenager, who was bouncing with energy. 

"Sorrygottafixthehair," the girl said quickly as she raced past in the direction the card carrying boy went.

Rogue blinked and shrugged, continuing on her way. When a herd of girls ran past her, obviously following their caffeine-crazed comrade, Rogue just pointed in the right direction.

~*~*~*~

Gambit was just about to charge a card and join back in the fight when he felt a sudden weight on his back. Hands gripped his shoulders. "What de fuck..." he tried to get a glimpse of his assailant. He raised an eyebrow. There was a young teenage girl. On his back. Attacking him. And apparently trying to get the black hood off his head.

"Gottafixthehairgottafixthehair…" the girl muttered crazily, tugging on the hood and probably pulling some of the hair out with it.

"Merde! Watch de hair!"

In his struggle to get the girl off, he twisted around, only to see a group of girls running in his direction. They all looked fairly normal-with the exception of that maniacal glints in their eyes and the fact that one of the girls was holding an electric razor. 

The girl on his back finally succeeded in tearing the thing off, revealing long hair that seemed to have a life of it's own. Remy looked rather disturbed. The girl, on the other hand, looked overjoyed.

She was dancing, waving the hood in the air, laughing maniacally. "The hair will not be repressed! Or oppressed! Or pressed at all!"

The 'leader' of the group turned to the girl nearest her, shaking her head. "We shouldn't have given her the Mountain Dew..."

Gambit looked at the group of girls, rubbing his head, feeling around for any spots where the girl might have ripped a little too much hair out. He looked them up and down. They were obviously crazed. Well, good thing his hair was out. Made him all the more charming. He grinned at them. "'Lo ladies…"

The girls were not impressed. One of them, looking slightly older than the rest and wearing a pair of pink tinted glasses, pulled out a rather large book and flipped through it. "That would be smirk number 153. The 'I'm God's gift to women' smirk."

The girl nearest to him (ignoring the dancing one) quickly swiped the staff out of his hand and promptly whacked him on the head. "Knock in off, hairboy."

Remy put on his wounded look. That had always worked before. "But…"

Some of the girls visibly softened, but the one with the staff gave them all taps on the head. "We have work to do."

The girl holding the razor grinned. "Yeah. We do." She paused and looked at her fellow fangirls. "GET HIM!!!!"

Before Gambit had time to react, he was on the ground, the girls holding down various parts of his body. Any other situation, he would have been ecstatic. But the girl with the razor was sitting on his chest and waving it over his face…

~*~*~*~

Even on the battlefield, a mix of English and French expletives could be heard above the hum of a razor.

"Stay *still*, Gambit! We've got to kill this thing on your face!"

"Merde! What is wit' y' femmes?!"

"-this won't hurt if you stay STILL-"

"-hold his eyes open!"

"What de hell y' gon' do t' me?"

"We know that isn't your real eye color!"

"Out with the contacts!"

"GAH!"

~*~*~*~

The one who had attacked him in the first place was watching with an amused look on her face. The black hood was now on HER head, and she was no longer dancing, but grinning like a maniac. She waited a few moments before the struggle stopped and the girls (most of them reluctantly) got off Remy.

He stood slowly and looked at his attackers with a cautious expression on his face. He was cleanly shaven (well, with the exception of a few nicks and cuts) and his eyes were back to their red-on-black color. A whoop went up from the girls.

He looked at them evenly. "Y'. Are. All. Insane."

The pink haired girl grinned. "Thanks!"

The 'leader', tapped her chin with the razor thoughtfully. "Not complete… It's missing something." A brunette behind her handed the girl two items. "Ah… perfect. Thanks, babe." She tossed the Ray-Bans and trenchcoat at Remy. "Put 'em on."

"But…"

"ON!"

"Oui."

As soon as he was done, the girls got closer. He flinched. The one who had previously swiped the staff threw it back at him. He caught it with ease.

"Now! Off to find Rogue!" a red head shouted, pointing forward. "Onward, girls!"

The fangirls circled Remy and, with some persuading, herded him off to find the his One True Love™…

~*~*~*~

The group observed Rogue encased in the green… stuff with slightly bored expressions. Well, except for Gambit. He was looking a bit worried…

"Well… fix her!" the one who had previously identified the "God's gift to women" smirk. 

Gambit looked puzzled.

The girl rolled her eyes. "Card… Charge… Boom."

Gambit blinked and pulled out a card. The girls ducked, and when the explosion was over, Rogue was out of the green prison and sprawled on the pavement. Remy held out a gloved hand to her.

She looked at it hesitantly before taking it and hauling herself to her feet. She looked him down. "Ya changed."

Gambit nodded. "Oui, chere."

One of the girls stood next to Rogue. "Don't you just LOVE guys that speak French?"

The goth raised an eyebrow. "He tried ta kill me."

"He was just trying to be cute," the pink haired girl stated, coming down from her caffeine high. She pointed to the hood on her head. "This thing's pretty snug. It was probably cutting off the circulation to his brain. "

Rogue glared at Gambit. "Not funny."

Gambit looked at Rogue somberly. "Sorry, chere…"

The girls let out a collective 'awwww'.

"Now…" the 'leader' said, "Go make out like good little cartoon characters."

The somber expression on Gambit's face was replaced by an eager one. Rogue was looking a bit more skeptical, but it was apparent that the signature Gambit charm and cutness was working it's way on her. "But… mah powers…" she tried weakly.

The redhead waved her hand in a dismissive fashion. "Not a problem."

"How—?"

"We're the Rabid Fangirls. We can do *anything*." The brunette stated matter-of-factly.

Rogue shrugged, her last bit of resolve dissolving. "Cool with me," she said, proceeding to jump into Gambit's arms.

The 'leader' gave a triumphant nod. "Our work here is done."

So Rogue and Remy went off to make out and the Rabid Fangirls went off to watch their televisions, delighted with the prospect of Remy/Rogue couple-ness and the fact that Gambit didn't look like a total ass.

And everyone was happy.

The End.

~*~*~*~

Kay finished typing her story, a contented smile on her face. "There. I fixed everything." She looked over at the gothic girl laying on her bedspread, flipping through a teenage fashion magazine with an expression of vague disgust. "You think we should just be glad they put Remy in the show at *all*?"

The girls looked at each other in silence for a beat, before Lilith shook her head vehemently and Kay wrinkled her nose.

"Nah."

The REAL End.


End file.
